Hello Friends! It has been busy on the farm and the follies have been flowing!
I’ll start with Richard. Bessie and Nelly are ready for babies and our little Frat Boy is just not growing. He can’t even reach, the poor guy. Boomer tries every now and then, but he doesn’t have the equipment…refer to the “Turning Bulls into Steers” post for more information on that!
Enter Richard. One of our customers offered us a bull in trade for hay. One of the best things about small town living: bartering and trades! Cattle Daddy agreed to this deal and the delivery date was set! The downside is that Red is his daughter, so she had to be part of the trade as well. I was pretty upset about losing my most animated girl, but we deliver hay to this customer often so I can visit her.Read More
Hello dear friends! This story is a bit different today…it’s not about my cows but about how the Crazy Cow Lady was born. It’s going to be real and it’s coming from a place of pure panic right now. Why am I panicking, you ask? No, there are no cows loose or needing injections or castration…it’s because I’m revealing some personal stuff and I’m an introvert, so it naturally brings on panic! And I apologize if it’s boring to some…but if it helps just ONE person out there, it’s worth it! Read More
I never thought cows would be so hilarious. They just wander around pastures, eating and pooping, right? Not hardly. They are always up to something! Cattle Daddy says their primary mission in life is to try to kill themselves. I can’t disagree. I’m like an overbearing cow mom half the time.
Today’s blog is a composition of our most entertaining moments with these guys and gals…never a dull moment on the farm! Forgive the picture quality, these antics happen when you least expect it! Photographic perfection is an elusive beast! Read More
Hello friends! Crazy Cow Lady here with more farming shenanigans! This one might be a little hard on the male population, but ya’ll be okay! So let’s get to the adventure!
I’ll start with another newbie failure to admit. I did not know there were different genders of cows (bows head in shame). Yes, I heard terms like steers and bulls, but I thought they were, well, slang perhaps? Read More
Hello friends!! Let me tell you, there is not a more terrifying phrase on this earth for a cattle farmer than THE COWS ARE OUT! This does not mean they are out in the pasture, it means they have escaped the confines of said pasture and are wandering freely. I just happen to have an example handy. Two, actually. Read More
Hello dear friends! Now, I know I promised you amusement and laughter at my newbie cattle lessons. I also want to promise to be real in telling my stories, and this one is as real as it gets. I want to share the other side of farming that mainstream folks may never be aware of. I’ll be honest in saying that I was hesitant to do so. This story is personal and heartbreaking for me, but…this is farm life. Read More
Hello dear friends! Today’s blog is about my first experience with subcutaneous injections. First, I want to briefly explain how I feel about any type of activity involving a syringe. I avoid it at all costs and must implement deep breathing and self-counseling to avoid full blown panic attacks. This phobia is so strong that during the paramedic perquisite classes, they informed us that we had to administer IVs to each other. I promptly dropped out of the program. Bye Felicia. Read More
My life goal of having a herd of huggable heifers was not going as planned. Bessie and Nellie were no longer acting like Dementors, but they sure didn’t like us very much. I was willing to give them time, seeing that we chased them through the woods and all, but we weren’t making ANY progress. They wouldn’t come anywhere near us and weeks had passed. I was very sad. These cows were defective. I wanted to send them back but Cattle Daddy said they had “nice breed standards” or something that made my eyes roll. He said it was normal cattle behavior to not like humans or hugs. This didn’t sound reasonable. I needed huggable heifers.
Cow Lesson – Newly weaned calves are Dementors from Harry Potter
Newly weaned calves that are stolen from their mommas, herded into a cattle trailer, and dumped off in a new place are crazier than college girls on spring break. Cows Gone Wild!
After witnessing the amazing athletic ability of these little devils, Farmer Friend and I headed back to the house to, well, I wasn’t even sure at that time…gather a search party? Print missing posters? Family from Ohio was gathered on the back porch and asked where the cows were, as they missed the grand arrival. Hmm. About that. I called Cattle Daddy at work to break the news. I hardly ever call him at work, so he knew something was amiss, and he was just as confused as me. “What happened? They did what!? Where are they?!” He leaves work early for the first of many “cow emergencies”. Read More
Well hello there!! Welcome to my crazy world! I must say, I’m usually not one for public pages and posting and such, so I’m stepping out of my comfort zone here. Then why are you on a public page you ask? Peer pressure, mostly. I like to make people laugh, and when people hear about my adventures, boy do they laugh.
Not too long ago, we bought a farm in the middle of rural Georgia. No biggie, right? Well, you see, I grew up in a suburb of Cleveland, Ohio. Yep. I’m a transplanted Yankee – but before you southerners boo and hiss, I did marry a redneck from nowhere, North Carolina so you hush. And then there is my mashed up, half-Yankee, half-southern words and phrases that you’ll have to endure…yep, I’m asking a lot here. It might just be worth it though. Read More